(1888PressRelease)
April 26, 2007 - Blame it on the lack of gun control, insufficient security or mental illness; but this only masks the real root of an old problem…a problem with a simple equation that led to another violent tragedy, this time on the Virginia Tech campus; taking 33 lives in the worst school massacre in history.
The equation is straightforward. When individuals, who are taunted, abused and humiliated by continual bullying by their peers as young people because they are seen as weird and different; in a society that looks the other way, condones and even glamorizes this behavior; and then you add easy accessibility to guns; you have massacres like Columbine and Virginia Tech. Confirmed by research in the Safe School Initiative,a joint project between the US Secret Service and Department of Education, it has been found that, “ two thirds of school shooters were victims of bullies.” (According to 60 Minutes program 4/23/07 ).
Humiliation, alienation, isolation is their mantra. Seung-Hui Cho, like the Columbine shooters was bullied and acting out of anger and rage sought revenge. “ They were both avengers of perceived injustices ,” stated John Nicoletti, a Denver-area police psychologist. “All these people did something wrong in their view, and they had to get even.” In fact, even more chilling was the reference that Cho made, in his manifesto, to the Columbine shooters as ‘martyrs.’
Wake up America…. we live in a bully culture and we need a new solution. Bullying has reached epidemic proportions in our country. We see its beginning as early as kindergarten where children age 5 learn that teasing and name-calling are power tools to use over their classmates. It continues and intensifies throughout elementary, middle school and into high school not only in the classrooms, playgrounds, hallways and buses but now on cell phones and computer screens. Studies have presented some alarming statistics, especially given the fact that many incidents of bullying go unreported. A national study by the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development (2001) reported that almost one in five children or 19 % of those surveyed in grades six through ten admitted they acted as bullies. One out of six or 16% said they had been bullied themselves during the current school term.
Worst of all is that our culture not only condones but rewards bullies as well. We bury our heads in the sand until a horrific tragedy results. Then we just give the issue ‘lip service’ and go back to our old ways. It seems that this age-old phenomenon has been denied, ignored and sad to say accepted as a ‘part of life…part of growing up’ way too long. This social cruelty has been viewed by many as a ‘ rite of passage’ that children are suppose to endure…after all ‘kids will be kids.’ Yet research and history has shown us the consequences of this isolation and humiliation to children in their formative years…consequences that may include violence to themselves (suicide) and others (homicide). Yet meaness, put-downs and verbal abuse toward individuals are admired qualities that are often glamorized and laughed at. Popular television shows like Jerry Springer, Survivor, Apprentice, American Idol, Imus, Howard Stern take pleasure and thrive on cruel insults and words that demean, criticize and reject others.
Wake up America ! Face the real issue: We live in a bully culture and until that changes the violence will continue. “Bullying is a ticking time bomb in our schools and in our society. America needs to defuse this problem before more children are harmed, killed or take their own lives.” (Seattle Police Chief Gil Kerlikowske).
We need to recognize the issue and stop speaking out of both sides of our mouth? We tell our children to be respectful, kind and caring of each other’s feelings. But, unfortunately the ‘do as I say, not as I do’ approach does not work because children generally embrace and imitate behavior modeled by adults no matter what we say, whether we like it or not. The solution: behave as we want our children to. Not only must we teach our children kindness, empathy and respect; we must live it.
